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Lost and Confused
4.3.05
Folding my arms around my knees
Tears running down my face as I breathe
Swaying back and forth all alone
Sitting lonely on my golden throne
Memories fill my mind and heart
As I watch your beloved nick part
Telling my last goodbyes to you
Feeling so sad and oh so blue
Feeling my heart crack into pieces
As the pain more and more increases
Digging my fingers into my sides
Loosing everything even my pride
Lost and confused, I’m sitting here
Not understanding what you fear
Was it all a game for your pleasure,
While I held our love like a treasure?
Greedy Hands
1.2.05
When night falls and stars
glow
Strong winds will come and blow
When the moon rises and I cry
Your efforts will be more, then just a try
And this I swear, will be the end
Cause what you lost, was not just a friend
Your words cut deeper then what you did
And I wished I could close the lid
But you keep sneaking out again
No matter how firm I pull the chain
Your greedy hands clawing into my soul
Tearing again on my hearts hole
Desperate Tears
4.3.05
Tears run down my cheek
As my knees go weak
Seeing you struggling free
Walking away from me
My fist hammers against the window
Feeling the earth quake below
My mouth opens in a silent scream
Realizing this is not some dream
Begging, praying, wishful thinking
Threw the grounds I’m sinking
New Hope
For Steve
18.2.05
The pain and emptiness have been all I knew
Till you came into my life, making it all new
Like a hurricane you whirled my feelings around
Capturing my heart, without making a sound
You left me breathless and longing for more
But my head wouldn’t let me go thru the door
Pulling me left, dragging me right
My head and my heart started a big fight
Should I give in and let love be set free
Or should I crouch and let my brain agree
Could I let go, the old sorrows and pain
Jumping the fence without getting insane
Can’t tell, if my heart has healed that fast
I still didn’t get rid completely of the past
And still, your virtual touch let me shiver
Each shared kiss causing my soul to quiver
Making me wish you were my soul mate
And not another painful prank of fate.
9.4.2005
Keep this fire burning
screaming out for what I’m yearning
watch the flames of doom
making space in this empty room
desperation eats me up inside
taking away my chance for light
cut me up, slash me down
everything hating what I known
jumping through the wired fences
ripping out all of my senses
blind, deaf, dumb and mute
will people still think I am cute?
Saviour Of My Night
20.4.05
make me laugh and make me cry
pull me down before I'll fly
make my day make my night
drag me out of this lonely flight
make me sing and make me rock
push me thru the traps u unlock
make me burn and make me shiver
make love to me till I'll quiver
be my lover be my knight
be the saviour of my night
Friends
25.4.05
She helps you up, she push’ you down
Making you on and on drown
She holds your heart in her hands
And still she can understand
Every effort of you gets crushed
Your feelings simply flushed
My heart breaks each time you suffer
Wishing I could make you tougher
Don’t want to see you crush and burn
Want you to get what you really earn
I overstepped my rights as friend
Growing closer, by the time we spend
My anger made me say these things
Harsh things that truly stings
Couldn’t keep quiet anymore
Nor was I able to ignore
I only meant it for the good
Never again will I intrude
I guess this made me lose a friend
But I hope my love will understand.
